Fashion & GearNovember 2, 2011

Furniture Men Hate

In the past few years I have learned a few things, some life lesson, some business skills and the far reaching fact that most husbands of my clients HATE four things: The Saarinen Tulip Table, Armless Chairs (specifically of the Barcelona variety) and Anything Lucite…and their most hated accessory THROW PILLOWS!  I cannot explain to you why this is, just state the fact that it is so.

1) The Tulip Table–  I have NO IDEA of all these three things why the design masterpiece that is the Tulip table is hated by so many men.  It’s not feminine in material or design (in my opinion) but is in fact STONE and METAL! Things men love! Raaaawwwrrrr! I have had THREE client husbands in the past year alone veto this out of design projects! Whhhyyyyy??

2) Armless Chairs– I think when men see a chair they think “how would it feel to watch football in this?” and therefore they think that all slipper or armless chairs are pointless. Even the Barcelona chair, which is again, METAL and LEATHER (Rawwwwrrrr!) does not change their minds about this.  My husband refuses to allow a (faux) Barcelona chair on the premises unless it’s in our bedroom to hold my mound of clothes (he is a neat freak and would NEVER).  The lack of arms almost always means I’ll be getting an email to find new options.

3) Lucite– Oh lucite. One of the most polarizing materials in design.  It in fact caused one of the most explosive arguments of my entire marriage in which I actually stormed out of a restaurant on Andrew. It went a little like this:

Me: I think I’m going to order a lucite console for the entry.

Andrew: What’s lucite?

Me: You know, thick clear plastic.

Andrew. No.

Me: What? Why?

Andrew: Because we don’t live in an episode of Miami Vice, that’s why.

Me: You don’t know what you are talking about, I’M THE DESIGNER!

Andrew: But it’s OUR house and I hate it.

Me: But our house is where I show off my skills! It’s my laboratory! Don’t stifle my creative work!

Andrew: No. It’s hideous.

Me: You’ll like it.

Andrew: No I won’t.

Me: I’m getting it.

Andrew: I will throw it out.

Me: (gets up and storms out- might have something to do with the three Sangria Margaritas I had, because I got to the curb and realized we had valet parked and Andrew had the ticket…..Ruh-Roh).

I think that clearly illustrated the strong opinion men have about lucite.  They also cannot FATHOM paying $400 for a chair made of plastic. Which I will agree is a bit silly. But still, nothing funks up a room (in a good way) better than lucite!

4. Pillows– I nearly forgot this one, but thanks to a reader reminder I can very enthusiastically state that the most hated home accessory of men is the throw pillow.  They do not understand the need for more than 2 on any given large piece of furniture.  Especially on beds. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had to explain the need for sleeping pillows, euro shams, regular shams and then accent pillows to men. They get exasperated, as if removing these pillows is simply too exhausting to bear!  They look puzzled and pained when presented with too many pillows.  If they could, I think they would stab pillows to death.

So, any insight into why I’ve had repeated negative feedback on these items from men??

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